We received out new waitlist number last week in perfect timing (from 28 to 26). I had been discouraged earlier in the week realizing that I was standing in a line—what felt like a long line—while there were and are approximately 145,000,000 orphans in the world. To me, the line waiting didn’t (and doesn’t) always make sense–but for us, it is just part of the journey the Lord has called us to. When I get discouraged, I like to be encouraged by things that are TRUE in my life. I love to make a LIST of what is true—it keeps emotions out of it (emotions are ALWAYS fleeting) and helps me see things for what they really are…emotions aside. Here were some things I walked through before ever getting our barely nudge up number to our sweet miracle…
* God has a plan for our family.
* God put adoption on both Richard and my heart and led us to persue our adoption last summer.
* Richard and I–along with our children–all feel called to grow our family through adoption—we are not only excited but passionate about growing our family this way. We believe this is God’s will for our family.
* There are 145,000,000 orphans in this world.
* We have room.
* God led us to an agency that has a wait. We prayed about this agency. The Lord confirmed this was the one we were to use through prayer. There is a wait.
* We could easily go with a different agency with a shorter wait. The Lord did not lead us to a different agency.
* We would have a lot more work to do if we went with a different agency—it would be confusing and not peaceful.
* We could adopt a foster child, after all there is a HUGE need, and have a baby in our home instantly.
* GOD led us to an agency that has a wait. And confirmed through prayer it was the place for our family.
* We desire MORE THAN ANYTHING to wait on God’s timing and God’s plan for our lives.
* God loves us and our waiting child more than we love ourselves or could ever love any of our children.
* God has a plan for our family.
[Yes, some things are repeated. I am stubborn, and I some times have to repeat what is TRUE more than once to actually hear it.] I got several very encouraging emails after a recent post sharing my “bummed outness” from wanting to open our home NOW and just frustration on the wait with so many orphans. The truth is, we ARE opening our home now—but we are waiting on the Lord and holding true that He has led us this far. There is no perfect adoption. There is no perfect agency. There is no perfect wait. Just as there is no perfect church. Until we meet Christ–there will be no situation that will ever be perfect. I can easily become impatient, but that is not from the Lord or the fruit of the Spirit. I believe the Lord is simply cultivating this fruit in our lives (mine specficially…I want drag my husband under the busy because he is diggin’ the wait b/c he knew it was part of it…I did too…but he is a much better listener than me…P.S. If you read my blogs honey you just need to visit more often and hear me confess my weaknesses because you know I won’t do that to you outloud;) The Lord is just doing all kinds of stuff with me…because HE LOVES US SO MUCH…He truly wants our hearts to be more like His. And changing our hearts to be more like His…well, this isn’t supposed to always feel good or be easy. SO instead of doing things “our” way—we will wait on His timing!
When I got the number 26 last week—I was excited. I really was. A few emails came in asking how I felt, but I have to say I am truly excited to be in the Lord’s will. The Lord had begun to already do a work in my heart teaching me patience and waiting on Him in this process! Did God really call us to adopt and WAIT in line with so many orphans in the world? Did God want us to go another way to bring home a baby? 1 Corinthians 14:33 says “for God is not a God of confusion, but of peace.” He is calling us to simply WAIT ON HIM…WAIT ON HIS TIMING…AND TO TRUST IN HIM! And in the WAIT to WORSHIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
His ways don’t always make sense to our little brains (quite tiny compared to the size of God’s I know)…but I have to trust in my God–that His plan for us is the BEST…way better than what we could come up with! I am the QUEEN of “want it now” and that is SO our culture. We want our churches to cater to us. We “waaa wo is me” when others don’t call us, serve us or think of us…first. Even my 4 and 5 year olds who don’t get it yet are quick to remind their friends when playing in their homes, “Well, who is the guest here?!” We are a people who expect and we are very good at getting our way. If it’s not done the way we want, we fire, we re-hire, we threaten, we complain. We want what we want when we want it. To be perfectly honest, my heart wants to bring home our baby…RIGHT STINKIN NOW. BUT…if I really, really, really think about if we are ready—UM…I think I could use about 5-6 months…REALLY. OK…so that may be about our time frame. Can we WAIT on God? Can we be transformed by the renewing of our minds and LET HIM BE IN CONTROL? Can we rejoice AND WORSHIP in the waiting and when things don’t go exactly like we want them to? Why do we have to complain when we don’t get our way yet maybe instead it’s God’s way…Well, it’s what our culture–me, myself and I–do best…waste time fretting rather than rejoicing. YET…
Philippians 2:14-18 says “Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. Hold firmly to the word of life; then, on the day of Christ’s return, I will be proud that I did not run the race in vain and that my work was not useless. But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God, just like your faithful service is an offering to God. And I want all of you to share that joy. Yes, you should rejoice, and I will share your joy.”
I’m holding on to the TRUTHS during this process. That the Lord faithfully brought us here. Our journey will not look like anyone else’s. Our wait may be shorter or longer than others. Our agency may do things differently. The bumps, the joys, the setbacks we hit will be different too. But in the end we will have a beautiful tapestry weaved by a PERFECT Creator. My emotions and my ways can NOT be trusted—but His ways CAN BE! I choose over and over again to cling to His plan for us—and with each month to celebrate another month on His journey for our family. Slower movement will mean less orphans are coming through (PRAISE JESUS!) Faster movement will mean the Lord has faithfully provided families to open their homes (PRAISE JESUS!) And the numbers—will just be numbers…until the very end…we will see a set of precious, big beautiful eyes…perfectly created by OUR Heavenly Father…and the wait—whatever it looks like—will be worth it! I believe my God is never a minute late. I believe my God is never a minute early. I serve a God who is always on time…and when you watch my “Gotcha Day” video in 2010…see the look on my face and ask me if I would have done ANYTHING differently!?
Can I get an A-MEN?! Let us hold fast sweet brothers and sisters TO GOD’S PLAN AND TIMING FOR OUR LIVES! He CAN be trusted!
AND JUST FOR FUN…
to share a project of numbers with you since we will not fret or get caught in the numbers AND because blog posts are just more fun and engaging with pictures—look what we did over the weekend with numbers in our home? Funny story–I had numbers on our staircase until we got our hardwoods refinished over the summer—which the painter painted right over them! SO, I got back on etsy.com and got more vinyl numbers. But look who I let put them up this time?!
These are so fun and easy! You just rub the vinyl letters on the wood and pull the paper right off!
Someone call child labor law…my fella was workin’ hard!
And WA LA! Doesn’t this make things more playful and fun?!
Merry Christmas from our house to yours!!!
P.S. Aren’t those tin frames the MOST fun. Check them out here: http://www.tinframes.com/