teaching them to mend…

I grew up in a home where we made the most of everything we had–and you didn’t throw anything away. If it was broken–instead of buying a new one, you carefully glued it back together…seemed up the stitch…and made the broken pieces relive their purpose.

When Rich and I got married–he thought I was crazy for all the little things I’d fix. Now, he laughs when something breaks…he sends it to momma to glue back together. (Some of you who are friends and have read for awhile have seen me glue many things back together…like Joseph two Christmas’s ago). There is something soothing…something therapeutic…about mending what is broken. And as I clamp pieces back together (like I watched my daddy do for years)–I always ask the Lord what He wants to teach me in this time of mending.

Rico Suave does occasionally try to draw the line. About this time last year, he was doing the laundry (yes–my man does help with the laundry!), and he spotted an apple size hole in our fitted sheet. He insisted THIS would not be mended…that was just ridiculous because of the hole’s size–we just needed new sheets. I agreed we could buy a new sheet set because we could use another so we didn’t always have to wait on the dryer to finish drying before we could go to bed with clean sheets–but I put my foot down too. This sheet set had nothing wrong with it. It just needed…to be mended. And it could still perfectly do the job it was designed to do.

I got out the needle and thread and began to mend the hole. As I was mending, my daughter Laney (just 5 years old at the time) walked in the room and with joy jumped on my bed to see what I was doing. She is like her momma and loves a good craft–only this wasn’t a craft to me. It was clearly an emergency. To save the 1 billion count sheets. I explained this wasn’t a craft–that it was momma trying to save the sheet set–I was mending it. And she was welcome to watch. I’ll never forget our conversation that day…

“Oh momma! Can I help???”

“Oh Laney. Let momma do this one. If it’s not done just so–it will tear more…and not be useful anymore.” But something in her eyes told me that THIS was part of my lesson the Lord wanted to teach me in this mending project–if little one was going to learn–really learn…then momma needed to begin to let go.

So I threaded a new needle and handed it to her. And with me holding my breath and biting my lips to keep from constantly correcting her, she mended that hole. It wasn’t perfect. In fact–a few days later a little gap in her mend caused my toe to catch it in the middle of the night, and it tore the hole a bit more. Out came the needle and thread again…and although I was tempted to fix it–I knew this wasn’t to be my thing to fix…but hers. I called her…and she came running with joy to make the mend.

So many times in my mommying, I want things to be perfect. I want to have my hands on things–and passing things off…especially to little ones can be hard for me. I want the cupcakes to look just so. The art wall to be displayed neatly. And I realize I’m really only attempting to make an impression on people that my heart wasn’t designed or charged to make impressions on. But these little hearts–these little hands…they were entrusted to me by my Creator…and I’m daily making the choice to choose to make impressions on their hearts rather than pretty things to be tagged on Pinterest or displayed on my blog. (I mean–truthfully…I tell myself that no one really reads this anyway–and this is just my processing…for my littles to one day read…and some times He’ll guide another over to read these words that He has something to speak to their hearts similar to what He is speaking to mine…)

Last night–it was time to mend that fitted sheet again. It’s seen quite a bit of mending sense that first hole…the trail of stitches is beginning to take on a design of it’s own. And I’m so, so thankful that I didn’t toss it out. Now when I’m sleeping at night and my feet feel the stitches in the sheet, I smile. I remember all the conversations we have had as she mends…how just because something looks like it’s not perfect, doesn’t mean it doesn’t have a perfect purpose…I smile thinking of the precious time and energy of those delicate tiny hands–with her brow tightened as she concentrates–trying so hard to mend the sheets, tie her knots and carefully cut the extra thread. I exhale with peace and joy remembering the look of confidence as she asks her younger brother proudly if he’d like to watch as she mended. I’m so thankful it didn’t have to be perfect–because now it is precious. And in this little mend, the Lord is teaching me to begin to hand things over, allow my children to really learn–even if mistakes must be made as they do–and to be sensitive to the Spirit as He teaches me too…

{mommies that feel overwhelmed like you can’t keep up–please also take note of the large pile of laundry you can see from the door opening. some things can wait…and i vote laundry is just one of those things:) i’ll be on top of it one day–when the kids are grown and gone…until then–i like my pile:)}