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Trusting and waiting…and day by day in the mean time

Life in the Young home is keepin’ on keepin’ on, and no matter how upbeat I sound in my blog entries as of late—I have gotten a few emails from some of my close blog/adoption friends asking how I really feel right now. I don’t even know how to describe how I feel–and I’m doing my best to trust the Lord for the 24th. We got new information today, and all I can say is that his birth mom is sick and really needs our prayer for healing. Our God is able!

Right?! I mean, don’t I trust Him?

I’m learning it’s quite easy to trust when things are good–and it’s funny because health unknowns…my heart trusts Jesus so much in. It’s easy to trust the Lord to help me love a beautiful baby. But what about when it’s hard and doesn’t make sense? I’m an old school hymn girl at heart–and today I’ve been reading the lines over and over of Louisa’s Steed’s hymn ‘Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus. I keep reading, and my heart is trying to sing them.

‘Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to take Him at His word;
Just to rest upon His promise;
Just to know “Thus saith the Lord.”

Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust Him more!

My heart is trying to sing and trust. Yet at the same time my heart is also singing this…

Adoption is such a beautiful picture of how the Lord LONGED for us—never gave up on us and even fought for us dispite our sin and difficulty that had to be overcome to finally have us as sons and daughters. I am overwhelmed that the Lord longed for ME this much!

Needless to say, my heart and mind are very distracted–and no matter how much I rest…my mind often drifts back to our next court date, the health of Isaac’s birth mom and what is really happening all over the world. Dispite the heaviness of my heart—I continue to give these things over to the Lord and open my hands with readiness to do whatever He calls me to do. I was thankful for this weekend to be spent with family. Laney had her gymnastics keeping us on our toes—Parker his last baseball game…Frank–well, he was of course as always along for the ride.

My sister brought her girls out to support Parker…and I was so thankful to have time with them…because these girls always crack me up…

Their momma is my older sister by 14 months–and it was her genious behind everything crazy I did as a child…and of course her idea to have all the kids pose like P’s trophy…the girl isn’t right…

Love this face P’s cousin is making…I think she just might adore her older cousin—she looks so proud of him!

Then family left. And on came Monday. My heart is daily doing the countdown to Sunday–and as much as I know I need to rest…I am trying to keep my mind and hands busy. SOOOO…today we decided to retwine an antique chair that my mom handed down to us. It was given to her by her Aunt Lizzy when she was Frank’s size—and all of my children have sat in in…and it was time to redo the seat…

Frank, Laney and I did this job while P was at school. They had a blast cutting the old twine off. Laney wanted to see what it was like to sit in it with no seat…

She giggled and thought it was funny. AND THEN…Frank wanted a turn. I knew it wouldn’t have the same effect…and his sweet little 18 month old mind didn’t get that the chair would no longer work without the twine…and—well, it hurt his feelings…

I found new twine at ole faithful Hobby Lobbyand we did phase 1 wrapping it around…

Then phase 2, Parker got to help with! He wasn’t as impressed as Laney was with helping…but after a few tight wraps and pulls…WA-LA!

Laney tested out the chair first. And then for good measure…Parker sat on top of her…

We asked Frank to forgive us again for not insisting earlier that he REALLY SHOULDN’T sit in the seatless chair—and to please give it a try. He declined at first, but then he agreed. But his feelings were still hurt and he only did it because we ALL BEGGED…”Are ya happy mommy?”

Thankfully, a bit more cheering from us…and we were all forgiven!

Then finally tonight…we enjoyed a beautiful evening with dinner outside…

And although the memories we make each day are as sweet to my soul as any…with each memory–there is an empty seat I see and I long to have it filled.

There are no doubts sweet Isaac, how much you are loved. Your siblings pray for you every morning and night…at EVERY meal…and we just can’t wait to have you home with us. Each night a special mother at Hannah’s Hope rocks you and puts you to bed…and I just can’t wait to be the one doing that! So many are praying you home sweet boy. May the Lord’s hand rest upon you as we put our trust in Him.

Last Refrain
I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee,
Precious Jesus, Savior friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.

Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er!
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust Him more!

Leigh - May 18, 2010 - 1:56 am

Praying for your heart. It is so hard when it feels like everything is out of your control and there is nothing you can do. Trust me, I know those aches and I am sure they are magnified by having a face to go with them.

on a lighter note, that picture of Frank sitting on the chair for the second time before you got him to smile, um…cutest thing ever. That is adorable and hilarious. What a cutie.

Megan - May 18, 2010 - 2:28 am

I love that thought of how God longed for us that much. Who are we…who am I that he would long for me? I’m nobody. I’m SO imperfect…I mess up CONSTANTLY. Really shows his love for us.

Thank you for your wise words in the midst of your hurting. I would be falling apart if I was in your shoes…I’ve fallen apart for less, that’s for sure. I admire your perseverence.

Lara - May 18, 2010 - 9:33 am

My heart hurts for you! I did love your pictures though. Redoing that chair looks like it was a tedious process – probably the kind of thing your need to keep your mind occupied these days. Praying for you –

Kim - May 18, 2010 - 10:54 am

All i can say is that I wish I lived next door.
You are heavy on my heart and faithfully in my prayers!
The photos are priceless and as always your post is God honoring.
Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus!
Love & Blessing from Hong Kong,

Shannon - May 18, 2010 - 1:45 pm

I’m with Kim…wished I lived next door so we could share some sweet tea, a cry, a laugh and some hugs. Praying for you sweet sister. LOVE the pictures of Frank…totally cracked me up! In my prayers~ Shannon