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The last 48 hours {a little roller coaster}

If you ask Rico Suave if he married a laid back–tough–roll with the punches girl…until this past year I’m willing to bet he would have quickly said, “You bet!” This last year though, oh my–I feel like I’m been on a bit of a roller coaster. From starting our home study last March for a little princess in China…then feeling too tired to think…getting blood work that said I had arthritis and Sjogren’s…then finally learning the culprit of those was spirochetes (the bacteria that I now hate so much that causes Lyme disease). For any of you who have this, have had this or known someone who has–you know it will WIPE out every ounce of energy you have–and often cause a bazillion other issues from GI, auto-immune, memory, adrenal failure, chronic fatigue, eye problems…and can even lead to things that appear to be Parkinson’s, MS, RA or Alzheimer’s in the works.

YESTERDAY–I headed to a 8am eye doctor appointment as I’ve continuously had blurred vision in my right eye. The doc won’t let me wear glasses or give me a new prescription because my vision is different every month in that eye–and my cornea is just irritated because of inflammation causing some serious blur…like–yesterday I couldn’t read the TOP line of the eye exam. Nice.

My morning started out leaving the house at 7am–because I see a specialist downtown…so I got to trek through this (thank you Rico Suave for doing this EVERY morning for our family)…

I have to confess. I am NOT a city girl at heart. Nope. I think this mom belongs on a farm–with chickens and a few goats…and maybe even a llama;) So–starting my day sitting in this and navigating with one eye…not the ideal way to start. And I wasn’t the laid back–tough–roll with the punches girl that Rico Suave married by the time I got called back either. For ONE YEAR I’ve been going to these eye appointments…and really, I’ve gotten a bit weary of them…so I make them entertaining by saying crazy things when a new physician’s assistant comes in to ask me if I have any concerns. I need to record these some time for your entertainment;)

Yesterday though–it wasn’t so crazy and instead more like this, “I still can’t see out of this eye–please don’t let the doctor try and give me steroid drops again because eventually that will cause cataracts and that’s not how you treat an infection related to lyme. I have 4 kids, I’m not just a number–and I really need to be able to see.” It was followed by silence…I think maybe that was too much;)…and then he said, “Let me go get the doctor”.

When the doc finally came in, he wanted to give me another prescription (of course)–and it can be so frustrating to live in a state where doctors know diddly squat about Lyme. I gave the prescription BACK to the doctor. Started crying…and then I broke up with my eye doctor;). Seriously–he told me he was moving up north–and wanted to refer me to a cornea surgeon. I left with eyes full of tears…both eyes blurry now–and just prayed the Lord was over all of this and would completely take these stinkin’ spirochetes/Lyme away because I loath them. When I got home–I thought I saw a tick on my van’s windshield…which I attempted to squash–and then I realized it was just an innocent brownish lady bug. Thankfully, he managed to fly away after I tapped him once (steer clear of someone with Lyme if you see a tick…they WILL squash them with vengeance!)

Now…that part is the DOWN part of my roller coaster in the last 48 hours.

And my sweet friend Tammy Dugger just happened to call as I was leaving the parking deck and she got to hear all about it. Can I just say I am SO THANKFUL for my best girlfriends who have just been such rocks during this year of crazy?! She surprised me later that day with THIS on my doorstep…(she got it at Hallmark…and the most fun part is one of my friends is actually the original artist!) What a treat of TRUTH!

On a side note–you better believe we are all about wellness and being healthy at our house. WHICH is why I think this next iPhone shot is so funny:) Look what I’ve got my kids drinking for juice??? FULL of 72 nutrients! Aloe Vera juice–it tastes like white grape juice…and it’s way better for them!

This morning I had a 9am doc visit with my naturopath doctor who seriously–is amazing. He is a strong believer…and after going through months and months of doctors trying to figure out why I was having arthritis, GI problems, adrenal failure, etc–with my first visit with him–he was able to pinpoint exactly what it was and send me for blood work to prove it. I’ve been seeing him monthly for 6 months–and 6 months ago began treatment to get rid of these awful problem causing spirochetes. Although I was bummed this morning to see the tests show they were STILL there–this doctor encouraged me and he believes that in a few months I will be 100% clear if I stick to my crazy regime of supplements, natural antibiotics and anti-inflammatory diet. I was encouraged walking through the waiting room of his office seeing patients from as far as Texas who fly across the country for his care–and I really believe he has a God-given gift of wisdom and healing. Some people think I’m nuts for not going to a regular doctor–believe me…I started there…but this is where the Lord has given me the most peace about. I’ve learned SO MUCH about taking care of myself and my family–and I love when you find a doctor that you really trust. My primary care doctor is completely on board too–and I’m just so thankful for the ways the Lord has guided and affirmed I am on the right path.

After a not so fun day yesterday–this roller coaster went right up…and I know today is a new day–and I’m trusting and believing I’ll not only kick those spirochetes/Lyme to the dust…but in the end I’ll be healthier than I have been in years. My doc thinks I’ve probably had spirochetes/lyme in my body for much longer than the tick bite I remember almost 2 years ago–but more like maybe even since childhood based on my symptoms and how aggressive these boogers are with me.

Today was such a great day as I felt like I was so encouraged–and we sat down and looked through my chart going back to November…celebrating all the symptoms that are now no longer there–and really how far I’ve come! I am still really tired every day. I still have chronic fatigue and often feel like I’m 85 with arthritis. And I have a completely whacked right eye. BUT…I can see perfectly with my left eye. I hands and feet no longer tingle (my rheumatologist tried to tell me it was possibly the beginning of MS–and that’s now GONE!), and the brain fog is gone too…that was AWFUL. And through it ALL…I have home schooled…4 little precious ones. THEY have stood with me and encouraged me. We have prayed together–we have dreamed together. And really–our lives will never be the same. I’m SO PROUD of my kids and how they have grown with me in this journey. And my Rico Suave–oh man. This has been better than the best of marriage counselors…as the “laid back–tough–roll with the bunches–I can do it myself” girl he married…can’t do it all and has simplified many things in our lives and home. He has cooked more dinners each week, not said a word if cleaning or laundry didn’t happen and encouraged me to stick with doctors who we felt best about even if they didn’t take insurance and it didn’t make the most sense to the world around us.

So thankful. And I just have SO MUCH to be thankful for.

Sweet Laney-loo today doing a little school work in waiting room…

After 2 appointments for momma (my other doc was followed by allergy shots–trying our best to keep Rosie–and keeping her outside for now…or at least trying to!)…we then zipped over to pick up Frank and Isaac from preschool. IT WAS THEIR LAASSSSSTTT day until the Fall! I can’t BELIEVE all the Lord has done in our youngest child’s life this year! This time last year I was so nervous whether preschool would be a good fit for him to do two mornings a week. He was a bit behind developmentally–but he SOARED and is now right on track with a rockin’ vocabulary that his teachers can’t believe! We said our goodbyes…and we will definitely be getting together with these teachers this summer for lunch as we bonded and love them so!

After lunch, nap time, Loo’s ballet…it was time to have a little celebration (told you I’m on a roller coaster;). Thinking about my littles today and how supportive and amazing they have been–I decided to fire up the grill and cook some hotdogs (don’t you worry…they are organic and free of nitrates and such!) Just ’cause daddy was in Michigan doesn’t mean momma can’t fire up the grill. (I wish I had a video of my trying to light it…I was throwing matches in the grill because the igniter doesn’t work and you have to light it after you turn on the gas…I was afraid of torching my eye brows so I was tossing the matches in. The forth one finally worked:) Loo tried to get my phone in time for the lighting action just in case…but she only got it ready for the successful part after the lighting…

THEN it was time for our home-made pops!

And that’s our last 48. Not exactly anything to write home about–but I figured I’d document it anyway…because I really do believe things will look different each passing month and I want to remember every bit…because no matter how hard some days might seem for me or for you–there really is sweetness and joy and miracles in each and every one. There are friends who are there for you that surprise you…and you realize how it’s better to have 3 really great friends than 300 or even 30. You see your kids trudge through with you–and you see their character form. You find yourself still holding your love’s hand–and really…you weren’t made for this world…but life is as it is now–might be as sweet as it ever gets. And you feel the love, the presence, the power and the peace of the One who called you to Himself…to trust Him on this journey–and all fear and worry is taken away…because really it’s just a calling to persevere..and that perseverance will produce character–more like the character of your Father–so even this…it will be worth it.

Hope you all are having a blessed week! XOXO!


Searching for Seamless - May 16, 2012 - 12:23 pm

I am always SO encouraged by your faith and hope as you press on and into Him! You are fighting the good fight, my friend!

Sandi - May 17, 2012 - 12:46 pm

Stay strong! Praying for healing & for energy!

arin - May 20, 2012 - 9:38 pm

I think you are an awesome mom!! I really hope to love being a mom as much as you do. I went to Created for Care in March and wanted to let you know in person, but I never got around to catching you! Your posts show so much love for your children and how hard you fight to keep you heart focused on the Lord and bringing your children up in Him, too!! You’re a breath of fresh air! I pray your illness will only bring you even closer to God and that he will give you strength!! Thanks for all you do 🙂