The Young Family Farm »

Masthead header

Learning to say ‘Yes’ and trusting the Lord with the Boundaries…

I’m really not sure what you would say if you were to look into my life this week…or most weeks. It really looks absolutely crazy–and I won’t overwhelm you with the crazy and I certainly do not want to share what I feel I’ve been asked to do by Him–because the fruit of it is really HIS strength working rather than my own. But I had a thought today when an acquaintance so kindly offered me some advice today when she saw me passing by in my crazy.

“Andrea. I have a really great book I want you to read. It’s really helped me–it’s about how to say no.”


And why did my heart feel so sad at that kind recommendation? This mom really didn’t know me–but what she did know is I looked and appeared over committed, and she thought this momma (AKA: ME) just needed to learn boundaries. But…

What if God is a God with limitless boundaries?

What if that same God asked us instead of learning to say no well and often…to stop pouring over books on maintaining healthy boundaries and how to say NO…what if He wanted us to actually take more chances in saying YES…even when it doesn’t make sense?

Why would we only say yes to what “WE” can do–when it’s really not supposed to be us doing it anyway? Wouldn’t we trust Him to do more through us if we really believed it was Him working?

What if we actually got down right messy with those who needed us?

What if we sacrificed our space and our comfortable…

Our schedules that already feel crazy?

To trust God with “there is NO way I can do this…I need peace in my day…BUT I see where you can work in it–I so here are my hands…use them if you want to. Let it be your strength and not my own…take it all Lord…and may it be YOUR strength alone seeing it through.”

I completely understand and agree that you can’t and should NOT say yes to everything. But when you see need…when you see no one else is already there…when you feel compassion and you feel it is from the Lord–yet your calendar seems full–instead of just saying you’ll pray…maybe He is challenging us as believers to really learn to make room for what really matters and to say YES…to be His hands and feet even when it isn’t easy or convenient.

I have to say–I have been so much more blessed by the yes’s…than the no’s. Yet the world encourages us to learn to say NO…and I guess to just let someone else do it? Stepping out in crazy…when it doesn’t make sense–RATHER THAN being protective over calendars, schedules and “When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life” mentality. I’m sorry–but *I* do NOT want to have control of my life. I can’t afford to protect my schedule or calendar…for myself. Because when you wake and ask Him to show you need–He will. When you ask Him to use you in it no matter what you think you can handle…He does.

Miracles happen.

And by His sweet grace, you get to be a part of it.

All the while your children are in it with you…and blessed through it. The “arithmetic and reading” of homeschool can just wait…because you have some times more important things to teach them.

I ran into that sweet acquaintance (that thankfully doesn’t know I have a blog;) again tonight who reminded me she had that book for me to read. I had to be honest, decline it–and say I really, really appreciated it. BUT–I just can’t afford to read it. I’m really trying to learn how to say yes and to step outside of my comfort zone. Because I think the world is really trying hard to teach us all how to say no instead.

Ali - December 12, 2012 - 1:51 am

So beautifully put….

Caytie - December 12, 2012 - 7:27 am

Oh my! I can so relate to this a bit. When God calls you to hard things and to live in ways that are so radically different it makes others question your motives and it can really thwart what God has for you if you cave to the “conventional”. We are accountable to Jesus for all that we do and that is where we rest and find peace in what He calls. It’s amazing though, how a little doubt from someone else can creep in and affect us if we let it. “Turn your eyes upon Jesus and look full in His wonderful face and the things on earth will grow strangly dim in the light of his glory and grace”. This has been my song this week. You sharing your heart might just be the beginning of her seeing life lived in a different way….! Hugs to you friend:)

Katie Day - December 12, 2012 - 8:12 am

Lol, I’m offered a Christian “self-help” book on a weekly basis because of the crazy people see. It’s almost become a talent and game to dodge those conversations now :). I like my crazy, chaotic life and really don’t see how living for others gives someone the idea I need to be fixed. You really just have to laugh and move on!

Nicole @ Living Out His Love - December 12, 2012 - 9:35 am

Oh Andrea, this spoke to me this morning. I am praying through something right now and I think this is what I needed to read. Thanks for your honest words.

Meggan - December 12, 2012 - 11:28 am

Perfect reminder. Needed to hear that.

Lauren Casper - December 12, 2012 - 3:15 pm

I love this Andrea!! I feel the same way! God certainly makes it clear when I’m to say no… but more often he makes it clear that I need to say yes… even when it is scary and looks crazy to the rest of the world.

I wonder if you declining the book taught this woman something. I wonder if she got a nugget of God truth out of what you shared with her. I hope so!!

Mary Ellen Ponder - December 12, 2012 - 3:39 pm

Andrea! Thanks so much for this post. You are so FULL of his Spirit it is incredible. I just love your perspective on things, because it is HIS perspective. I still remember reading your post on how God DOES give you things that you cannot handle, so that we will turn to HIM instead of rely on ourselves. This post will be remembered for years to come as well. Thanks for ministering to my soul!

Jessica - December 12, 2012 - 10:29 pm

Oh how I LOVE this post. Saying no to things that don’t matter is one thing, but not being available to God is another. We just brought our 7th sweet child home 4 weeks ago–to our crazy homeschooling family that has grown 4 times through adoption in less than 3 years. I can’t imagine if we had said no because what God was calling us to was more than we could handle (and believe me, it is more than we can handle in our own strength). The best parts of my life have happened when we’ve said yes to the “crazy.”

Sandi H. - December 12, 2012 - 10:54 pm

I have friends who make similar comments in jest & I simply ask, “If I don’t help, who will?” There is no greater feeling than to know that despite our imperfections that God chooses us to say, “Yes!” & he entrusts that we will step out of our comfort zones to help those in need. Like the lonely older gentleman at the grocery last night whose basket was full of pot pies, who needed assistance paying for his groceries to be reminded that there is good left in humanity. Or the sweet nurses aid who missed work today because her son is in the hospital, who as a single mother will need help with hospital bills. Or the families who are struggling just to pay for food, who will get help paying for Christmas. It is no accident that we feel that we have no choice but to act when we feel that he is whispering to our hearts. He may be overfilling our plates but those who turn away are missing out on a feast. Can an employee say, “no” to the boss? Fulfilling needs is his business…we are all his workers…