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Happy Birthday sneak peak…

Here is a sneak peak into our afternoon fun at our house celebrating Isaac Temesgen’s first birthday…

MORE pictures to come!!!

It has been such a wonderful, sweet day—and I didn’t realize all of the emotions I would feel on this day. I have always been so anxious to get our son home–that I never thought too long on the months we missed. But today, brought an ocean of emotions…wondering what the first 10 months were like for him, wishing I could have been there for every moment, wondering what his birthmom would think if she could peak into our home today and see how much our son is loved. Last night, we were invited to attend a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese’s of a neighbor friend. I have funny pictures to share of that later of me, Laney, Parker and my parents (Rich was home with the babies). We had so much fun…but of all places–it really hit me in the midst of fun…

I saw a man with a TEENY newborn whisk by me…and my first thought was, “I missed that.” And then—I felt that lump in my throat…and standing there with my cup full of coins I felt the tears come and I held them back. Fast forward to today–12 months later…12 months of longing for him…praying for him…and NOW knowing just a bit of what he has been through—and that it is a pure miracle that he is healthy and here today…in OUR home, in OUR family and just WITH US forever.

No one prepared me for what this adopted momma would feel in her heart today.

As I sang happy birthday, I hoped no one would look at my face as it crinkled up singing and I just had to start lip singing instead of letting sound really come out…because I knew if they did the tears would follow.

And in those 30 seconds…hearing little giggles…little voices sing…and seeing his eyes light up—I WAS OVERWHELMED with thankfulness.

I wish she was here to share it with me. I wish she could see how happy he is…and how he is thriving. A part of my heart still lies across the world…and for the one who gave him life and did the best she could for as long as she could…so he might sit in that highchair today and let us celebrate his life…I am forever thankful.

Sweet love, Isaac Temesgen–one day you will read these words. I hope you know how much we love you. How I have missed you and longed for you to be with us…and how THANKFUL I am that I got the joy and honor to sing to you and celebrate your first birthday with you. The Lord’s hand has been on your life. He has carried you through…and my, how He loves you!!! His love is steadfast–it can be trusted and it’s always there. I know you will live life feeling like others let you down at different points…some days you will even feel that way about me. But His love is steadfast…and it is a privilege to love you with and through His love. I am so thankful to have you as my son—and I can’t believe He would choose ME to be your mom forever. Happy birthday to my baby boy! I love you to pieces and pieces and more pieces. To the sun and back…to the moon and back…and ALL the way around the world!

Happy birthday my love…Momma

Meghan - August 7, 2010 - 5:00 pm

Tears of happiness and sadness all mixed together. Happy Birthday Isaac Temesgen – you are one blessed little boy!!

Sara - August 7, 2010 - 5:49 pm

The video was so precious. Reminded me of our Cheru’s first bday (we brought him home at 11 months old, so celebrated soon after, like you guys). He had that same expression – bewilderment, and then a funny smile when he heard is name. So sweet. I, too, have been struggling with mixed emotions lately. Yesterday, I had this moment where I realized how much I had missed of my daughters’ lives. None of the kids noticed my eyes were bright with unshed tears.

With the boys, it was different, I didn’t grieve that loss for a long time. Maybe it’s because I’m a parent already, and I know what I missed? I don’t know. But I have also been thinking a lot about all our kids’ birth families…this is long and all over the place. Guess I just wanted to say – I’m right there with you.

Debb - August 7, 2010 - 6:10 pm

You have an ever-precious heart. I thank you for your honesty and transparency. i am “going through this with you” via your blog, and I feel it is enlightening me, encouraging me, inspiring me, as my husband and I have recently become DTE!! God placed Issac into the arms and heart of a very genuine and loving Christian family. WOW! What an awesome first birthday present! ;o) Blessings to all of you ~ may you continue to enjoy your precious birthday celebration……..

Kristin - August 7, 2010 - 6:38 pm

Happy Birthday sweet Isaac! Reading your words made me think about celebrating our little one’s 2nd birthday with him 3 weeks after he is home with us (which is 3 weeks from yesterday!) Those emotions are so REAL, and I am overwhelmed with gratitude that we can experience them…

Kim - August 9, 2010 - 1:06 am

Another beautiful post … straight from the heart!

melissa - August 9, 2010 - 1:42 am

Happy Birthday sweet Isaac Temesgen! I can’t imagine the emotions you felt. I can only begin to know what its like to hold your child you have longed for and then to mourn the time you missed in his life. My God’s peace overwhelmed you. Love you and I am eager to catch up. Praying for you.

Kelly - August 9, 2010 - 2:42 pm

Happy Birthday, Isaac! I actually sent your mommy a text message on your big day. I’m so sorry that we missed your 1st birthday party! We were on vacation. We love you!